


I Don’t Love You Like I Did Yesterday

by shadowhive



Series: Umbrellakink fills [10]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Dirty Talk, Fantasizing, Hand Jobs, M/M, Mutual Masturbation, Realisation, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 12:45:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19296028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowhive/pseuds/shadowhive
Summary: After Mikey reads some The Umbrella Academy fanfiction, he starts to re-evaluate his feelings for his older brother.





	I Don’t Love You Like I Did Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> So I recently got some more Waycest hate which is, you know, tiresome. So I won’t to do a Waycest fic out of spite because of it. However before I did, I saw this umbrellakink prompt and my mind started working.
> 
> For the Umbrella kink meme prompt
> 
> Mikey starts reading tua fanfic, about whatever ships you'd prefer, and eventually (or from the start) there are sibling ships involved and it leads to a reevaluation of his relationship with Gerard. Bonus points if Mikey makes a joke about the fic to Gerard to gauge his reactions about sibling stuff. 
> 
> tl;dr - waycest through the lens of tua ship fic

Mikey was proud of his big brother. He had been for various reasons over the years. He was proud of him for his art skills, for his abilities as a singer, for getting clean and for the awards he’d gotten for his comics.

Right now, he was proud of him for getting The Umbrella Academy made into a series. He knew how crestfallen he’d been when the promise of a film version has fallen through, so to see this work out had been amazing to see. 

Mikey had seen the early reviews come through on twitter and it had felt wonderful to see the positivity for the show. Mikey didn’t see it until the red carpet premier and he’d been blown away by what they had done with his brother’s work. Everyone had done such a wonderful job making his work come to life and he was sure to let everyone that was there know what he thought.

As soon as the show came on Netflix Mikey had binged the whole thing, unable to stop watching as he was pulled along by the story. Sure it was familiar to him from the comics, but it was different enough to work on its own. He’d been sure to call him up when he finished it, congratulating him and letting him know what he thought in a call that lasted almost an hour.

Judging by the reaction on social media, he wasn’t alone. Thousands of people were watching the show and talking about it, from all over the world. Of course it would take time for the general public to watch, but as far as he could tell fans of the comic and the band loved it.

***

Mikey had kept an eye on social media the weeks after The Umbrella Academy dropped and already he was amazed by what he was seeing. People were loving it and not just those that were already fans. There was already art of all the main characters, though it would seem that Klaus was a favourite. Something about that made him particularly glad, because he knew that Gerard had based on the comic version on him.

One comment piqued his interested though, about fic being up on a site called ao3. Mikey wasn’t a stranger to fanfic. He’d known of its existence but he never really seeked it out before.

So he went over to the site, deciding that he’d just check it out to see what the fan reaction was. After navigating through to the tag for the show he was surprised to see just how much there was already. In such a short amount time there were several hundred fics up. The descriptions for them varied wildly, covering a range of varied subjects. Some were about what people thought was going to happen next or with the family making things up to one another. Others were decidedly more... graphic.

Mikey bit his lip as he read the tags, which described various sexual acts. Anal fingering, anal sex, rimming, bdsm, fisting... Mikey’s mouth went dry as he read those words, his eyes going wide. The vast majority of these pornographic fics were between the Hargreeves siblings. Ben and Klaus as well as Diego and Klaus seemed to be the most common so far and... he could see it actually. They did have this vibe going on, like when Diego called Klaus baby and the expression Klaus had when the knife had been thrown at him... and the two dads scene. Mikey had heard Robert and David commenting in an interview about how they had sexual chemistry and he’d definitely picked up on it.

Before he knew what he was doing he was clicking through and starting to read.

***

Mikey panted softly, his cheeks flushed and his thighs trembling. Fuck. These people, their minds were fucking filthy. Mikey took a deep breath to steady himself, licking his fingers clean before tucking his cock away, zipping himself up.

Fuck.

***

That may have been the first time he read pornographic fiction about his brother’s creations, but it wasn’t the last. He felt guilty at first, in part because it was his brother’s thing but also because they were, well, brothers.

That guilt past pretty quickly. 

People were just so talented and they were so filthy. The things they had come up with, there were things he’d never even considered doing before but now he was eager to try.

He didn’t always read smut though, he read other things to. Some were the sweetest things, were the brothers shared their first kiss or date. Others were alternate universes where they weren’t related, but they had gotten together. There was even one inspired by the two dads comment, where Diego and Klaus ended up adopting Five. That had been something that had made him feel so many emotions as he had read it, making him eager for the next part every time.

The strange thing about it all was the thoughts that he had started to have.

It popped into his head as a stray thought during one of his jerk off sessions. It had been a fic about Klaus and Diego, where they had been fucking. It wasn’t even particularly kinky, just dirty talk as they Klaus fucked into him but it triggered something in him. Right before he came an image came into his mind of Gerard in Diego’s place, with Mikey fucking into him.

It left him, quite frankly, shaken.

He tried to shake it off, turning his iPad off and trying to think of something else. Maybe watching something from his list on Netflix would take his mind off things.

***

The thoughts didn’t end there, if anything it was just the start. He thought of Gerard with him, kissing him, holding him, sucking his cock, moaning his name. It felt like every filthy thought that crossed his mind involved his brother somehow. He wasn’t sure what he should do with this. What the fuck could he do?

He sighed, shaking his head as he rolled over in his empty bed, wishing that his brother was laying there next to him.

***

Gerard smiled at him, waving him over as Mikey carried his cup of coffee over to him. It had been the first time since he’d seen him for awhile, even though they had talked on the phone all the time. It was good to see him again though.

“Hey, how’re things going?” Mikey sank down into the seat opposite him in the booth, taking a sip from his still warm coffee.

“Good.” Gerard replied with a smile. He looked good, happy and content in a way that made mIkey’s heart ache. “I wanted to tell you something actually. I wanted you to be the first to know.”

“Oh?” Mikey asked, raising an eyebrow as he set his cup down to give him his full attention.

“There’s going to be a season two!” Gerard grinned brightly and Mikey felt his heart beat a little faster. Fuck, he looked beautiful. “I mean, I know the early response was positive and Steve left it on a cliffhanger so it seemed likely, but to have it confirmed it something else.“

“That’s wonderful Gee, I really am so happy for you!” Mikey cursed being on this side of the table, wishing that he could hug him but maybe it was for the best he didn’t. Instead he reached over, giving his hand a squeeze, which Gerard returned. “It’s going to be amazing.”

Gerard nodded his agreement, still beaming. “I’m thinking maybe I’ll be more hands on this time. They said the offer is still on the table if I wanted to be more involved so I think I will. It’s all so wonderful Mikey.”

“It is, everyone seems to love it. You should see how people are acting on twitter and stuff. People are being so creative with it. And I’ve heard places are selling out of the the graphic novels too.” Gerard grinned at that, nodding as he sipped some of his own coffee. Mikey had to close his eyes, drinking some of his drink so that he wasn’t distracted by his lips. “People are writing about it too.”

“Yeah, I’ve... heard about that.” Gerard’s cheeks flushed a small smile playing on his lips. “I think I’m going to tell them they should take advantage of it. To... let things progress you know? I want Allison and Luther is already there, but I think it’s pretty obvious that Diego and Klaus have a... vibe.” He waved his hand at the word vibe and Mikey couldn’t keep his eyes off him.

“Even though it’s incest?” Mikey asked, shifting his gaze over to meet his. Gerard’s eyes were beautiful, so warm and pretty... he could easily lose himself in them.

Gerard shrugged slightly, running his fingers through his long hair. “I think there’s nothing wrong with it as long as it’s consensual. Certainly with them there’s a number of factors that make it less awkward.” He bit his lip, looking down at his cup as he lifted it up. “Do you think it’s a bad call?”

“No, not at all.” Mikey shook his head, not wanting his brother to think he was against it. “I think that’s a great idea.” A million thoughts ran through his head and he wasn’t sure exactly what he should do with them. Fuck, he should make an excuse to leave or run to the bathroom or...

“Mikey are you sure you’re ok? You’re shaking.” Concern filled Gerard’s voice and Mikey looked down at his hands, sure enough they were trembling on the tale top. “You’re not using again are you?”

“No. No, it’s nothing like that.” Mikey sighed, shaking his head, hating that he’d worried him. “Can I tell you something? And promise me you won’t judge.”

“You know me Mikes, I never will.” Now it was Gerard’s turn to reach over, squeezing Mikey’s hands with his own. “What is it?”

Mikey took a deep breath, meeting his eyes again. “I read some stuff, some Klaus and Diego stuff with them... you know.” Mikey would have made a lurid hand gesture if his hands were free.

“Oh.” Gerard smiled as he let out a soft laugh. “Oh Mikey that’s ok, there’s nothing wrong with that, they have such chemistry.” He squeezed his hands to reassure him. “If you’re worried I’d mind I don’t, honestly it’s ok.”

“I’m glad...” Mikey smiled, his fingers stroking against Gerard’s hands. They were so soft and he found it hard not to let his mind wander. “Reading them made me think things though. Things about us.”

“What do you mean?” Gerard asked, his voice soft as he spoke, his hands still holding Mikey’s.

“Fuck... I thought about us. About doing those things with you.“ Mikey closed his eyes, turning his head away from him. As soon as he said the words he felt the trembling return, his hands shaking in his brother’s touch. “Please don’t think I’m a freak. I couldn’t bear to lose you over this.” Mikey could hear the tremor in his voice, not wanting to meet his gaze to see whatever disdainful expression he no doubt had. Mikey wished that he had Five’s ability, that he could just disappear out there, or go back and stop himself from saying anything.

Gerard lifted their joined hands up, planting a soft kiss against the back of Mikey’s right hand. Mikey risked opening his eyes to look at him and Gerard’s expression was soft, his eyes as full of love for him as they always were. “Nothing you do would ever make you lose me. I’m always going to be here for you no matter what.” Mikey released a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding, relief washing over him. Of course Gerard wouldn’t reject him for this, he was the most accepting person he’d ever known. 

Mikey allowed himself a small smile, flexing his fingers to squeeze his brother’s hand. “Thanks Gee, I was so worried you’d freak out.”

“Never.” Gerard’s eyes darted to the side, out of the booth before he leaned over the table, closer to him. “Actually, I’ve got thought about it too.” He spoke in a soft whisper, his cheeks become flushed. “Kissing you I mean.” Mikey felt his eyes widen, his breath catching in his throat at his brother’s admission. He could feel his heart pound a little harder in his chest, his eyes drifting to look at his soft lips, that were now so close to his. “Do you have any plans after this?”

“No...” Mikey whispered with a slight shake of his head, wondering where this was going. 

“Let’s finish our drinks and go back to my place. Only if you want to of course.” Gerard bit his lip, looking Mikey in the eyes as he waited for a reply.

“Of course.” Mikey nodded, trying to keep the excitement from his voice as he let go of Gerard’s hands.

He’d never drank a coffee so fast in his life.

***

It had been awhile since he’d been in Gerard’s home, mostly because the past few weeks had kept him busy. The Umbrella Academy becoming a series had to a fresh flurry of interest and so Gerard had done a bunch of interviews for it. Mikey knew he found it strange to get so much attention after so long but Mikey was proud of him for it. He deserved it.

His brother’s home was just like he remembered it. It was filled with books and memorabilia from the various shows and films they’d enjoyed since they were kids. It was nice, cozy. It always felt like coming home in a weird way, even though it looked nothing like the house they’d grown up in. None of that mattered now though, as his heart was pounding, the possibilities for what was to come making his mind race.

Mikey was sat on the sofa with his brother next to him and he wasn’t sure what to do. He’d never been great at making the first move, certainly not while sober and this felt so different to any other of his sexual or romantic encounters. And that’s because it was wasn’t it? None of the others were like Gerard, not Bert or Pete or Ray. He’d been close to them, but nowhere near as close as he was with his brother.

After a few moments of uncertain silence between them, Gerard broke it by speaking. “I want to kiss you. Is that ok?” It always amazed him how different Gerard was to his personas on stage. Those were confident, charismatic and assured whereas off stage he just reverted to the usual soft, shy, geeky boy that Mikey had known his whole life.

“Yeah, I want that. So much.” Mikey replied with a nod and he knew he’d never wanted something this much before. Gerard closed the short distance between them, his lips meeting his own. They were so soft, softer than he’d imagined them to be and he couldn’t resist reaching over and wrapping his arms around him. Gerard did the same, holding onto him as he parted his lips, his tongue darting out along Mikey’s mouth. Mikey parted his lips, admitting the soft tongue into his mouth and letting out a low groan as it wiggled against his own.

It was strange, but it was like no kiss he’d ever had before. It was soft and sweet, gentle and yet urgent and needy at the same time. Every flick of Gerard’s tongue made his whole body shiver and his cock ached in his too tight pants. Why had he not done this before? He could have been doing this for years and he was determined to make up for lost time.

Mikey shifted his hand up from Gerard’s back, tangling his fingers in his long dark hair, returning the kiss urgently. Now it was his turn to taste his brother’s mouth, darting his tongue inside him to explore the wet heat. He felt Gerard moan against him, the sound swallowed by his eager lips and Mikey was sure it was the sexiest thing that had ever happened to him.

The pair of them parted after a few more moments, the need for air overriding their need for one another. Both of them were panting, eyes blown wide with arousal. “Mikey...” Gerard whispered, his voice soft and breathless, and Mikey shivered at the thought that he had been the one that had caused that. “Fuck...”

Mikey nodded in agreement, unable to form words as he brushed Gerard’s hair away, leaning in to kiss and lick along the newly exposed curve of his neck. He wanted to do this all over him, to kiss every part of him from the back of his wrists to the soles of his feet. He wanted, needed, to let Gerard know just how much he wanted him how much he needed him.

He was broken from his thoughts by a tug at the back of his head and he pulled back, looking him in the eyes. “Mikey, I want... I mean I think we should...” Gerard closed his eyes and took a breath, and Mikey could tell that he was composing his thoughts, trying to order them in a way that could be understood. Mikey gave him all the time he wanted, his fingers stroking the back of his neck soothingly.

Gerard’s eyelids fluttered back open after a few moments and he nodded, his pink tongue darting across his lips. “Ok. Ok.” Mikey meet his gaze, waiting for him to continue. “I want you Mikey, so much but I want our first time to be... special. So maybe we could just... take things slow.”

“Yeah, of course.” Mikey couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed by that, but at the same time he needed his brother to want this as much as he did. If Gerard wanted them to go slow, then that’s absolutely what they were going to do. “What would you like us to do? Because I’m fine with making out all here all afternoon, even though I’d likely need a change of pants by the end of it.”

Gerard’s breath hitched, his cheeks flushed pink at Mikey’s words. He shifted next to him and Mikey glanced down, catching sight of the bulge in his brother’s pants. “Can I see it? Your dick.”

“Of course!” Mikey nodded, his hands shifting instantly between his legs. He was fairly sure he’d not gotten his flies undone this quickly before. He lift his lips up off the sofa, pushing his pants and boxers down to his knees, freeing his arousal for his eager gaze. “Can I see yours?”

Gerard nodded, his fingers trembling as he worked his pants open pushing them and his own underwear down his legs, his dick aching against his t-shirt. Mikey had seen it before, lots of times, it was unavoidable living in such close quarters not to have caught an unintentional peak at it. It wasn’t even the first time he’d seen him hard, for the same reason. But this was different now. The air between them was charged and Mikey couldn’t stop from looking at it, committing the sight to his memory. Gerard’s dick was a little thicker than his own but it looked to be the same length and Mikey wondered how it would feel in his hand, how it would taste on his tongue, how the thick dark curls surrounding it would feel like pressed up against his nose.

“Fuck Gee...” Mikey whispered, his voice sounding almost reverential to his own ears. “You look so beautiful.” He didn’t articulate all the filthy thoughts that were swimming through his head, though from the look Gerard was giving him he was sure that the feeling was mutual.

“So do you Mikes.” Gerard murmured, his tongue running across his lips. “Can I touch you?”

“Yeah.” Mikey nodded, spreading his legs as best he could for him. Gerard reached out for him, circling his fingers around his dick before starting stroke, letting out a soft gasp as he jerked him off. The touch, was slow and steady, but it made his cock throb all the same. “Can I touch you too?”

“Yeah, fuck Mikes please.” Gerard nodded, licking his lips as he parted his thighs. Mikey instantly took advantage of the invitation, reaching over and wrapping his fingers around his dick. It felt so warm in his hand and it fit so right. He started to stroke him right away, trying to mirror Gerard’s movements. “You feel so good, I wish we’d done this a long time ago.”

“Yeah...” Mikey sighed in pleasure, rolling his hips to meet his touch. Would he have wanted this though, had Gerard asked him before? He shoved such thoughts away, choosing instead to focus on the now. He wanted to commit all of this to his memory so that he could relive it whenever he was alone. The way Gerard’s fingers felt wrapped around his dick, how his lips were parted as he moaned, how his cock felt in hand. “You look and feel amazing.” 

“You do too. I love your cock Mikes.” Gerard let out a breathy moan, licking at his lips as he increased the pace of his movement. It made Mikey let out a soft groan, speeding the movement of his own hand in response. 

Mikey had never been jerked off like this before. He’d always felt that getting a hand job off someone was a disappointment, unless it was accompanied by a dick in his ass. That wasn’t the case with Gerard though. Sure, part of him wanted more, but his brother’s hand felt so right around him. He closed the distance between them, their lips meeting in a heated kiss. 

Mikey’s cock throbbed in his hand as his tongue eagerly explored Gerard’s mouth. His brother groaned, the sound captured by his lips as his fingers moved faster around him. Mikey’s eyes fluttered as he melted into the kiss, jerking his hips to meet his hand. He could feel it, deep in his belly, that he was getting close. He should feel embarrassed that something as simple as a hand job and a make out session was bringing him this close this fast, but he found that he didn’t give a fuck. “I’m close...” He whispered against Gerard when he pulled back from his lips, sounding even more desperate somehow.

“Do it Mikes. Cum for me. I want to see it, want to taste it.” Gerard purred the words out, licking his lips as he jerked him off faster. “Fuck, look at you. You’re so sexy for me. Let go. Come on...”

His words went straight to Mikey’s dick and he groaned. “Fuck Gee...” He tightened his hold on Gerard’s cock as he came, spilling across his tee, his head tilting back.

“Yeah, that’s it. Look at you, you’re so beautiful.” Mikey felt like he was swimming, in a daze from his orgasm. Gerard trailed his fingers through the mess he’d made and Mikey watched through half lidded eyes as he messily sucked them clean. If he’d not already came then the sight alone would’ve done it. Gerard’s fingers, slick now with his spit, covered Mikey’s hand, stroking himself. All Mikey could do was watch, feeling breathless as he saw Gerard moan, spilling over himself after just a few strokes of their joined hands.

“Yeah Mikes, fuck...” He let go of himself, clearly more composed than Mikey felt and he dragged his fingers through the cum pooling on the dark fabric of his t-shirt. “Want to taste?”

“More than anything.” Mikey nodded, parting his lips so that Gerard could slip them into his mouth. He lapped the salty fluid from his digits, groaning at the taste of him. Fuck, he couldn’t get enough of it. He knew this would be far from the last time he’d get a taste of it, he just hoped next time would be straight from the source.

“I don’t know about you, but I could certainly use a drink.” Gerard smiled, his fingers sliding from between Mikey’s lips. He stood up, tugging his underwear back up but letting his pants drop to the floor, stepping out of them. 

Mikey nodded, leaning back against the sofa, sighing softly. “Yeah, that sounds great. Thanks Gee. For everything.”

“Thank you Mikes, you’re the best.” He leaned down to kiss him briefly, smiling. “I’ll get us a drink, then we can find something to watch yeah?”

“Yeah, that sounds perfect.” Mikey smiled, feeling more content then he ever had before as he made himself comfortable. He knew that there would be questions and discussions about this new dimension to their relationship, but Mikey was content to push them to a later time so that he could enjoy the moment. He smiled to himself, tasting Gerard on his tongue as he waited for him to come back, eager to spend the rest of the day in his arms.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are awesome


End file.
